Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dear Brian Duensing

Hey Brian,

How's it going? I'm pretty good. You know...same old, same old. Can you believe this weather? Crazy, huh?

Anyway, I don't know exactly how to say this, so I'm just going to say it. I don't think you should start the season with the big league club. Don't get me wrong. I'm a huge fan of yours. We were even college classmates for a semester. Great times, huh? I mean we had great times separately, because we never met, but you know what I mean. I just don't think your stuff is cut out for a bullpen role.

Also, R.A. Dickey throws a knuckle ball. So you understand why I want him on the team. You see, knuckle balls are awesome. Dickey's is extra awesome because he throws it hard. You have both had success this spring, but Dickey did it with one less ligament. And did you know that the metrodome is climate controlled? So, yeah. It's pretty much like a knuckle ball incubator.

So Brian, I hope we can still be friends. But unless you are willing to give up a ligament, learn to throw a knuckle ball, or both...I think it's best you go to Rochester. Don't worry, bud. You'll get your chance.

Your pal,
Soup

3 comments:

TwinsWin83 said...

I hear ya Soup but we gotta have that extra left handed arm outta the pen and Mijares didnt cut it this spring, so Duensing is the next best option.

If the Twins didnt have to put Humber on the MLB roster out of camp in order to hold on to him Dickey would take his spot as the teams long reliever, but because the club doesnt want to give up on Humber yet that wont happen. So it looks like Dickey might be the odd man out.

Maybe you should write Dickey a sympathetic note to help him get through the demotion to AAA if it happens, I bet he would appreciate it Soup.

jammyman said...

yeah, you guys could be pen pals. either way, lee jenkins from SI picked the twins to win the series.

soup said...

I don't think we need two leftys in the pen. And Duensing isn't really a lefty specialist type guy. I haven't looked up his spits, but I'm guessing that left handed batters hit about as well as right handed batters against him.

Anybody else want to trade Humber?