Friday, October 9, 2009

Random Notes Post

First, here is the 2009 Homer Hanky.

It also doubles as the 2008 Homer Hanky as it was printed last year, before the Twins lost game 163 to the White Sox. Good job using the three R's, Twins marketing department!

This is also the most expensive Homer Hanky ever, retailing for $2.00. One possible explanation for the price doubling is that this hanky serves two purposes against the Yankees: the reverse side is solid white.

Apologies Segment:

Sorry Joe Mauer. Before the season began, I predicted that you wouldn't play a single game in 2009. You're welcome for the motivation though; you've been a durable workhorse after coming off the DL in early May. I hope you destroy Derek Jeter.

Sorry Minnesota Twins. When you fell three games behind the Tigers last Wednesday, I thought it was all over. I wrote a blog about going to the dentist instead of offering hope. That'll teeth me!

Sorry Orlando Cabrera. When you came to Minnesota, I wrote you off as a bone Billy Smith picked up only to throw Mauer and Morneau. I thought you were only here to make it look as if the front office were still trying. You've made solid contributions, while maintaining nappy defense and flawless hair.

Sorry starting rotation. When I wrote, "could [Duensing] be that ace for the playoff run?" I never could have dreamed you'd be starting game 1 of the ALDS in Yankee Stadium. But I could have guessed that you'd get knocked around.

Sorry Joe Christensen. I called you a homer for agreeing with the Twins when they publicly worried how turf would affect Joe Crede's bad back. You were right about me. Tell your sister, you were right.

Hating the Yankees

When I talk about hating the Yankees, the main argument usually goes like this:

They're only good because they have money.

Which isn't entirely true. Besides that, it also hurts to say, because as a Twins fan, it's essentially admitting defeat. In fact, it's the very same reasoning Bud Selig used to try to contract the Twins in 2002.

Someday, I'll come up with some air-tight logic as to why the Yankees should be hated. But right now, I don't need a logical reason to hate them. I'll hate them because they're good and they're playing my favorite squad.

And also, fuck Jay-Z.


bizmarkie507 said...

Joe Nathan is somebody I'm not a fan of.

Career post season numbers for Joe:

7 gms, 8.0 IP, 10 hits, 7 ER, 7 BB, 0-2, 2 blown saves, and has just one save. ever.

11.2 mil a year for a closer that can't pitch when it matters is not so good for this budgeted twinkies squad

TwinsWin83 said...

I know it never should have come down to it in the first place with Nathan blowing a 2 run lead and the Twins leaving 17 men on base but common, have you ever seen an easier call blown in a game that matters like that?

I dont understand why MLB brings in 2 extra umpires for the playoffs just to sit on those lines and make one or two calls a game if they cant distinguish the difference between a foul ball and a ball that is a foot and a half in fair territory.

Ive seen a lot of shitty calls in my life (brex will remember a terrible call by a second base umpire vs. Alexandria @ the Legion state tourney) but that tops them all. And to make the call in a game of that magnitude in the 11th inning is just beyond me.

bizmarkie507 said...

i really despise joe nathan.

Daymonster said...

I must have skimmed over this clever quip until now: "One possible explanation for the price doubling is that this hanky serves two purposes against the Yankees: the reverse side is solid white."

That's golden.