Wednesday, April 16, 2008

More Dumb Twins Mailbag Questions, Answers

We'll try it again. Over at the Twins official website, beat writer Kelly Thesier periodically fields questions from the fans. It can make for some informative baseball talk, but it's not exactly groundbreaking stuff. You see, Ms. Thesier works for the Twins, so she is required to tow the company line and remain optimistic about things. So I'm going to answer dumb fans questions from the biased, negative fans view. Click here to see the original Q and A.

Q: Why were the Twins willing to invest big money into Joe Nathan while letting Torii Hunter walk via free agency?
-- Maximilian S

A: Ugh, we've been over this. Torii wanted years. Many years, for lots of money. Now if you want to talk about the true value of a closer (vs a centerfielder), that is debatable. Here's a question for you: what kind of name is Maximillion?

Here's a quick question I missed from last time. I'm not even going to answer it, because the question is hilarious in and of itself.

Q: What are the chances that the Twins could get Barry Bonds? It seems not many teams are interested in him, and I think he'd fit good as another veteran in the Twins young lineup.
-- Donald W

Nice fucking grammar, Don.

Q: I was wondering if Carlos Gomez is still eligible for Rookie of the Year and if not, what is the cut off point?
-- Michael P

A: Ok, this isn't such a dumb question, although you could just as easily google it. I think Michael P just wants to see his name on the internets. Cool man. Gomez is not eligible for rookie of the year, MICHAEL P.

Q: Did the Twins front office ever think about giving an extension to Delmon Young while he is still inexpensive? Or is that on next offseason's agenda?
-- Anthony H

A: I don't understand how anyone could get that excited for Delmon freakin Young to actually suggest that he deserves an extension. Someone has been drinking the Delmon kool-aid. That's just disgusting.

Q: Is there a possibility that we may see Nick Punto demoted to Triple-A Rochester with his continuing struggles at the plate and no signs of any improvement? Could he possibly be traded during the year?
-- Scott B

A: Yeah, that's a good idea Scott. If the Twins sent down Punto, he could work..on...his...hitting. hahahaha, and uh, become a b- better hitter. HAHHAHAHAHHA. Okay, can't type that with a straight face. Insert your own joke about his... trade...value.


haasertime said...

the reason the delmon young answer is ALMOST funny is because Yours Truly drank a ton of Delmon KoolAid, before last fridays post when Nick and Ryan set me straight.

Karleeee said...

I'm still addicted to my Punto Pop.
Fo sho.

soup said...

I think you should do this at least once a month, Haas. It's too good.

I hate how Kelly always puts the name of the person who asked the question in her answer. It's always like:

"well, ron, that is a good question. Liriano's slider is tough on the elbow, ron. His slider, however, is his best pitch. So, Ron, they might not want to tinker with his motion. Although they might want to tinker with his motion because his motion causes injury. But only time will tell, ron."

I realize it is tough to write anything controversial when you are on the payroll of the Twins, but you can still have a damn opinion.

Daymonster said...

The last one made me laugh out loud.

I wish we had a fan base so we could take questions and answer them like that.

tfrezac2002 said...

Do you think that Mets fans, after Johan's "terrible start" would take Punto? Or maybe we could send him to one of the Japanese teams for a bowl of shark fin soup.

haasertime said...

yeaahh.. but i do think we should try to answer some dumb question that we submit. Sign it Al Hamilton or something. Ha!

I love Shark Fin Soup!

haasertime said...

I will always drink the Delmon Kool-Aid. he's gonna be better than Puckett!

haasertime said...

^whoops that was Bizmarkie who's drinkin the Kool-Aid. Forgot to log out of haas' laptop.

Anonymous said...

I'm still drinking the Delmon Kool-aid as well. He's gonna be great.