Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Hanson Brothers Would Be Proud

By TwinsWin83

In what might be a first here on AH! I am going to dedicate an entire article to Minnesota’s pro hockey team. I was already planning on writing an article on the Wild’s playoff series yesterday and prior to last night’s game my focus was going to be on a ridiculous article written by a Denver Post journalist named Mark Kiszla. If you haven't read it yet, check it out here. The moronic author of the article not only lampooned the Wild for being ‘goons’ but also ripped their jerseys and the very state they come from, calling Minnesota the land of “10,000 dead car batteries.”

Now I’ll admit I was a little upset as I read the article but tried to tell myself it was coming from a bitter sports writer who knew nothing about the sport or the rules of appropriate journalism and was upset that his team was down two games to one. I was planning on writing about what an idiot Kiszla was in order to rally AH! readers against any sports journalist who dares write such a preposterous article about our fair team and state. And then I sat down and watched Game 4 last night.

Not only did the Wild seemingly give up down 4-0 halfway through the second period but they reduced themselves to throwing down with every Avs player that gave them a dirty look. I’m all for a hockey game full of big hits, checks and even a fight or two, and I know players must defend themselves and their teammates, but for the final thirty minutes of this game every time there was a stoppage of play there was four or five players getting into meaningless scrapes.
People will say, “well they needed to show Colorado that they wouldn’t back down and that they can be physical throughout a seven game series.” I think all they showed was that if they get down early by more than a couple goals they get taken right out of playing their game. I know it was 4-0 eight minutes into the second period but that means there is still over thirty minutes to be played. Throw in a rebound goal and a power play score here or there and all of a sudden its 4-2 with an entire period left to play. Instead, the Wild resorted to ringing up 26 penalties for 111 minutes, completely taking themselves out of the game.

The question now is can they snap back into playing their style in Game 5 after removing themsleves from it for half a game, or will they be reduced to ‘goonery’ should they get down early again? The Wild did a lot of things right in the first three games of the series and they need to get back their aggressive, yet controlled, style of play or they will be heading back to Colorado for Game 6 staring elimination in the face.
As much as I would love to rip Kiszla for what is truly one of the worst sports articles I have ever read, it is hard to do so on the heels of last night’s game. But you should feel free too here if you'd like.


bizmarkie507 said...

I love it. The best part of last nights game was when 3 Colorado Jerseys were holding back boogard from beating the hell out of that guy. Simon is my favorite player in the NHL because he's completely insane. I love the Wild being bullies who suck at hockey yet beat the hell out of everyone. Keep it up.

Daymonster said...

The best part his he essentially wrote the same article in 2003 when the wild took out the avs.

"The Denver Post

April 13, 2003 Sunday 1ST EDITION

Ugly truth is Wild no match for Avs

BYLINE: Mark Kiszla


LENGTH: 734 words

After watching the hideous Minnesota Wild for two games, you don't know whether to spit or take a shower.

Minnesota, whose red-and-green uniforms must have been inspired by those gauche folks who leave up their Christmas lights all year, ranks No. 1 in the NHL in only one department. This has to be the worst dressed team in hockey.

And the Wild plays even uglier than it looks. This motley crew does not try to win so much as it hopes to frustrate the opposition into losing. Minnesota is as good an argument as any for contracting the playoffs."

Daymonster said...

classic level headed easy going avs...


bizmarkie507 said...

haha nice daymonster. Who hired this guy? He's a bigger rube than most kfan callers.

haasertime said...

Reading the comments on kiszlas article is a pretty fun way to waste two hours of your life. I don't know much about hockey, but im pretty sure that guy knows less.

heres reusse's take on the situation

TwinsWin83 said...

Yeah apparently this guy does this type of thing quite often.

It is fun to watch hockey when people are fighting and knocking each other around Wutur, but I would rather see the Wild win in the playoffs, and they arent going to win any games with the formula they used last night.

It was like they were trying to 'stand up for their dignity' in a ridiculous manner much like the Mighty Ducks did against team Iceland in the championship game of the movie D2.

soup said...

I am a total bandwagon hockey fan. I only pay attention if the Wild make the playoffs.

I do enjoy minnesota's passion for hockey. I get swept up in it.

I like sports like hockey and baseball that have a degree of legal retribution for show boating or cheap shots.

bizmarkie507 said...

yeah it wasn't very classy. But I'm the biggest bandwagon hockey fan, and I'd be lying if I said I pay attention to the Wild other than when they are in the playoffs. So I'd personally rather watch Chris Simon try to murder somebody than the Wild win a Stanley Cup.

bizmarkie507 said...

Geez Soup, that was scary.

Pills said...

Being a self proclaimed NHL nerd I think what the Wild did last night was short of what you should do in a playoff blowout like this. Foss you say they had half the game left but in playoff hockey 4 goals is like 10 goals, players takes such responsibility in their own zone it is nearly impossible to score goals in large quantities. I think the wild took alot of penalties but they didn't take the right kind. They should've sent a message for the next game because once it got to 4-0 there was no way the wild were coming back. You have Boogaard, Simon, Fedoruk go out and beat the shit out of someone whether they want to fight or not. Not saying they didn't try but the refs were so anal about something happening that everytime these guys looked at someone wrong they were given a 10-min. misconduct. I think the Wild will come out and win the series, they just are a team that cannot come back from more then 2 goals like the position they put themselves in last night. I won't address that guy's article but if you listen to coachs around the NHL they have said they like playing the Wild and Avalanche back to back because they play the same neutral-zone trap( as do 12 other NHL teams but Jacque is notorious for it) and same style of "boring" hockey. No it has just turned into a long rant, but you have to look no further then the Avalanche not being able to sell out playoff games to know how much Colorado people know about hockey. (tickets are going for almost 3 times face value for game 5 in St. Paul).

haasertime said...

it sounds like hockey has weirder and broader unwritten rules than baseball.