by Mark Waters
There are very few memorable moments in the Twins Legacy from 1995-2000. They were perennial losers playing in front of crowds of 4,000 fans. One flicker of light beamed from a man by the name of Ronald Bryan Coomer. A one time all-star, Ron Coomer was the beer-league-looking Minnesota 1st baseman. He always had the carefree smiles in the dugout, and he even hit over .290 for two consecutive years. So what if he couldn't beat out a double play to save his life? His hairstyle, which resembled the security guard's dome from the Running Man, canceled out his athletic weaknesses.
Several years ago I got a free ticket to a Minnesota Wild Skills competition. It was a Saturday afternoon and I had nothing else to do so I figured I'd go check it out. As I walked in and grabbed a program I just flipped through it out of boredom, then all of a sudden I read the Celebrity All Star Game rosters. Paul Allen, Don Shelby, among other "celebrities" as well as former North Stars were on this list. Then I noticed Ron Coomer's name.
I could not believe it. Coomdog somehow qualified as a celebrity, and I couldn't have been happier. Although he didn't score any goals, he played with passion and grace.
American League All-Star Selection by Default, 1999. Booyah!
Last season I scalped a ticket to watch Game 1 of the divisional playoffs. I was pumped to see Santana lead the way in attempt to take the first game of the series. As I watched Jesse Crain give up the crushing bomb to Frank Thomas, my heart completely imploded. I, among 55,000 other fans, filed out of the dome with our heads down. As I walked toward the light rail, I looked up and saw some cameras ahead. Then I noticed the back of a sweet sports jacket and the slicked back hair jutting out of the top of it. I yelled, "Yeah! It's Ron Coomer!" Then he does a half turn look-over-the-shoulder, with an ear to ear grin, looks me in the eyes and goes, "Hey, what's up?"
Never have I went from a horrible sick feeling, to pure happiness faster than that moment in time. "Hey, what's up?" Better words could not have been spoken.
I bought a Yankees Suck T-shirt at
It listed:
Giambi...sucks
Posada...sucks
Williams...sucks
Pettitte...sucks
Rivera...sucks
Coomer...sucks
And Jeter swallows
The fact that Coomdog is listed on there makes me LOL every time I look at the shirt.
After a dome game I hope to see him again getting ready for some color commentary action, and get a picture with him pointing at his name on the shirt. That photo would become my life long facebook avatar.
So his career on base percentage is only .313. Who cares? His intangibles in awesomeness completely made up for it
I Love you Ronald Bryan Coomer. Don't ever change.
Here's a link to Ron Coomer's official fanclub group on facebook
(The group kind've sucks, but hey, it's his official facebook fanclub.)
10 comments:
I recall visiting the dome during those slums of the mid-to-late 90's.
Since we didnt have much to cheer for, we made up a fan club for the only player that made us grin, Ron Coomer. Lead by Foss, we would where our magic marker coomer shirts, and sit in our lower-deck section all to ourselves, yelling out, "COOOOOOOMER!"
those were the good old days.
Ahhhh coomdawg, my second favorite twin of the bad years.
A short little bio...
http://www.cfswingtown.com/who_own.shtml
Ron Coomer -- the Mickey Hatcher of his generation.
t fran, who was your first fav? Denny Hocking?
I love seeing Coomdog on twins live, he embodies the twins hometown-small market-positive attitude-scrappy spirt.
He was defintely one of my fav back then, he actually hit a home run once in a while too. Nice post wooter.
we should probably get Coomer to play 3rd base for us.
Nick Punto is terrible. He can't hit (old news) and he can't even lay down a bunt. He makes terrible fielding decisions and when he rarely gets on base, he makes bad base running decisions.
the last two games almost all of our offense has come from home runs. not a good thing to lean on. it's awfully depressing when the twins can't do the fundamentals and the small ball things.
i might get a framed photo of Ron Coomer and Marney Gellnar working together. they're great.
My number one would have to be the at one time heir apperant to Kent Hrbek, Scott Stahoviak. Nothing summs up the bad years for the twins like a 96 game against the Yankees, Stahoviak had 2 homeruns by the 4th and then the game was called for rain. When they replayed they lost 11-1.
Heres a nice little bio on the man, the myth the legend: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Stahoviak
Yes! Yes! Yes!
my fantasy baseball team name: rontoosexycoomer (in first place, by the way)
I used to be a host at KFAN the restuarant. They used to film the twins pregame show there. So, I would get to say hi and have brief convos with Ron Coomer himself. It was awesome.
One year at TwinsFest (back in the days when it wasn't crowded; perhaps '99 or '00) my buddy and I were watching Joe Mays speak at the Channel 9 booth to a bunch of fans, when all of a sudden, everyone (including the people on the podium!) turned around and looked straight at us! We were obviously freaked out, until I looked to my right shoulder to find Mr. Coomer, sporting his trademark goofy grin, perched right there! He gave us a laugh and a pat on the back, saying something like "Scared ya guys, didn't I?" Needless to say, for a couple of 14-year old Twins fans it was quite a thrill.
And that's my Coomdawg memory of the moment.
those were the good old days, when we could all buy 5 dollar tix in the lower GA and then move to sit right on the 3rd base line without anyone hasseling us. Those Twins teams might not have been the greatest but it was fun to sit 40 feet from Coomer and yell his name at the top of our lungs. HEY GAREDENHIRE GIVE HIM THE BUNT!!!
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