Tuesday, October 7, 2008

The Case for the Rays

Now that the team I hate the most (White Sox) is out of the playoffs and the team I live the closest to (Cubs) are out of the play offs and the team I love the most (Twins) never made it into the playoffs (thanks to the team I hate the most) I have decided I am going to root for the Tampa Bay Rays.

I made this decision immediately after the Twins lost the 1-0 tie-breaker game at US Cellular Field. I walked to the nearest Lids and purchased a brand new Rays cap. Side note: is anyone else upset they stopped making the wool New Era 59Fifty hats? The new polyester ones don't shrink at all and now I am in between sizes. I either get a headache every time I wear my hat or I have to look like this. Also not to mention why are the bottom of the bills black now? I think they should still be green like they were when we were little.

Back to my point: There are a lot of reasons why I think the AH! nation, hand full of people, should put their support behind the Rays. While most of these have been addressed by the national media at some point I think it's best we take a look at all of these in one list.

Payroll: The payroll of the Rays this year is $43,820,598. The next team remaining in the playoffs are the Phillies at $98,269,881. Over twice as much... While I know I don't necessarily want to reward teams for being stingy, in this case a lot of it has to do with the players being so young.

Young Players: The average age of the Rays is 27.4. That's only a little older than me! They are totally just like us! The Red Sox average age is 31.33. That's like the age of our grand parents!

Took the Devil Out: Is it a coincidence that when they take the "Devil" out of their names they suddenly stop being terrible? I think not, they are truly "a beacon that radiates throughout Tampa Bay and across the entire state of Florida."

Matt Garza: He was my favorite of the new young crop of pitchers. I still like him and I want to see him succeed.

Their Wikipedia Page: It lists Jason Tyner as a "Notable Former Player"

They are Terrible at Math: According to the team 9 = 8. Ridiculous, there is NO WAY nine equals eight. I think they meant 9 > 8 or maybe 9 ≥ 8.

Geography: Does anyone else thinks it's great that there is a team called the FLORIDA Marlins and then another team with the name of a city/metropolitan area within that state with their own baseball team? I mean what if it was the Chicago Cubs and the Illinois White Sox, that would be insanity!

Polite Fans: While I can't make a generalization like that and be 100% accurate, but come on they have a guy called the "Gentleman Heckler"

I think I have made my point. We can't have another Red Sox World Series Victory... there fans used to be cool when they could never win, now that they can they are just as bad as any other team. The Dodgers don't deserve to win the World Series let alone make the playoffs. The Phillies is the only other team I could maybe tolerate winning, because their fans are assholes already.


bizmarkie507 said...

one thing that kind've worried me was knowing that if the Twins won the one game playoff, then I would have to cheer against the Rays. And I didn't want to do that.

k-bro said...

Yes! Rays all the way!

And speaking of their fans, they managed to get Bobby Jenks to whine about the cowbells.


Even more reason to love the Rays.

haasertime said...

convincing argument. I will hop on the Rays bandwagon.

I don't really like their crazy prowrestling type atmosphere at the trop, but whatever.

They new polyester hats are just another trendy sporting goods decision. Just like the new NBA ball, new polyester hockey socks, and the breathable armpit on baseball jerseys. Pretty soon we're going to see bellbottom baseball pants to match their polyester suits. stupid under armor.

TwinsWin83 said...

Mike if you played baseball ud dig under armour.

That might be the first ever hockey reference on AH! from haas as well.

Im down with the Rays but it almost seems too trendy now. Problem is, the other 3 teams still playing are all very unlikeable to me.

Does anyone want a LCS preview or not? If so Ill try and throw one together before Thursdays opener.

Good question on ESPN today...Does baseball go to far with champagne celebrations after clinching the division and after each round win in the playoffs?

Daymonster said...

do a preview.

And yes too much champagne, but at the same time I can only see cutting out a few of them.

Clinch playoffs/division
Win Pennant
Win World series

I feel that we can jump on the Rays bandwagon, we have reasons.

soup said...

I will root for the rays to beat boston because I hate boston. I am not, however, on the Rays bandwagon.

Case against the Rays

'Bout damn time: Seriously, how many years of having top 5 draft picks does it take to make the playoffs. The team has a low payroll because their talent isn't old enough to get paid.

Act like you've been there before: even if you haven't. You all shaved mohawks in you heads?!?!? cool, so did my middle school soccer team. I like my teams to be professional and go out there and handle their business.

Cowbells: I don't like any artificial noise makers at baseball games.

It should have been us: This is a very selfish reason. But I just feel like the Twins were the poor man's Rays this season. Which, we were, but it still sucks.

bizmarkie507 said...

let me ask this. whats a more annoying noisemaker? cowbells, or drunk boston fans gloating/picking fights in the bleachers?


Daymonster said...


k-bro said...

May I clarify my stand on the cowbells?

I don't really like them either. Especially in a domed stadium; wow, what a headache.

However, I did enjoy that they made Bobby Jenks whine. Because you know that if the Evil Ugly team had started it, he would've been all for it.

My take on the champagne: Twice should suffice -- in the playoffs and winning the WS. Otherwise, celebrate with a Dairy Queen cake or something (but for God's sake, don't throw it around).