Thursday, May 8, 2008

Gomez's Cycle: I Was There

I was at the game last night and I tried to document everything that happened. Unfortunately around the 7th inning my camera ran out of batteries. But I took good notes and a few pictures before it died. If you don't believe that I was there I have this to prove it.

My memory is a little fuzzy (much like the above picture) after a few $6.50 Miller Lites but I assure you this is as close to accurate as I can remember. Here goes.

5:00pm - Left work to meet Anna at the El stop.

5:33pm - Arrived at Sox/35th stop. Rode the train for about 30 minutes surrounded by people in Sox garb, but they waited until we were getting off to start heckling. Pussies.

5:40pm - Picked up the tickets from will call. Asked if we had parking passes about a thousand times by dudes trying to resell them after we left. I am not going to fall for that again.

5:55pm - Anna knows a guy who knows a guy who owns a place called Grandstand. It's probably one of the most amazing baseball fan stores I've seen. There was literally thousands and thousands of different pieces of White Sox merchandise. I went in there looking for a Twins jacket but unfortunately they only had every other team in stock. I was just impressed that they had any other team besides the Sox in stock, but I would think Twins gear would sell better than Rays.

We went in the back room where there was some guys drinking beers and smoking cigars. We had a couple beers and heard about how Swisher was there last night after the game and said that he never had a chance on the double from Mauer. It was slicing away from him the whole time and how he was bummed about Floyd not getting the no hitter (obviously).

6:30pm - Walked back to the stadium to take our seats.

7:00pm - Oldest woman ever throws out first pitch.


7:05pm - Good looking girl sings national anthem on the field. Ugly girl behind me sings as well. Girl on the field was better.

7:08pm - Rain. Grounds crew rolls on the tarp. It's a big DHL tarp but they put it upside down, I wonder if DHL didn't pay this month.

It's hard to tell here but it's pouring.

7:30pm - Still raining. Talked to some dudes that were here from Charlotte, NC. Bank of American was in the process of taking over LaSalle Bank and today was the first day all of the LaSalle Bank signage was changed to Bank of America. They were here to watch the signs I guess.

8:00pm - Raining really hard now. Anna says if the game doesn't start by 9pm we are leaving. I agree reluctantly.

8:30pm - Rain stops. Everyone cheers and goes back to their seats.

8:32pm - One of the tractors is stalled that is holding down the tarp. They finally get it started and off the tarp.

Not a good advertisement for Toro.

8:34pm - Tarp is off and they are announcing the teams.

8:37pm - I look into the Twins dugout and Gomez is warming up. I have never seen it before, he is doing some sort of dance move. I tried to document it but it's hard to see. He is jumping up and down and moving his arms up and down like they did in the 50s.

Whatever works for you Gomez.

8:45pm - Game starts... finally. First pitch from Buehrle to Gomez. Ball.

Second pitch: Gomez shows bunt.

8:46pm - Third pitch, smoked to left field about 3 rows up. Gomez - 1-1 (HR). Gomez was rounding second by the time the ball got out of the park.

9:06pm - Four Sox fans behind me were some of the best hecklers I have heard in a long time. It wasn't just the material but it was also their delivery. We got into it a little bit when Pierzynski got a hard single up the middle and one of them asked if I wish we still had him. I quickly explained that I'd take starter and one of the best closers over AJ any day especially when Mauer isn't exactly a downgrade at catcher. My argument would have been better if they would have asked in 2006.

9:13pm - Gomez strikes out swinging. Gomez (1-2, HR)

9:45pm - Punto bunts what looks to be foul and get doubled off in the rare 2-5-4 double play. Punto is irate and starts yelling at the home plate umpire.

9:46pm - Punto is pacing in the dugout and still angry. You wouldn't like Punto when he's angry.

9:47pm - Gomez is up. Hecklers start making fun of his necklaces, says he looks like Wilma Flinstone. I thought it was funny. Gomez did not as he hits a two out triple to left center. Gomez (2-3, HR, 3B) I then get into a discussion with the guys behind me if Gomez will hit more triples or more home runs. I say more triples.

9:49pm - I look over to my right and this is the guy I am sitting next to. No lie.

9:55pm - Nick Swisher is up. His facial looks even dirtier in real life, especially when it's pink. The guys behind me start blowing up a blow up doll with the words "Slump Buster" written on it. Hilarious.

10:03pm - Buehrle intentionally walks Delmon Young to set up the double play and get to Mike Redmond.

10:04pm - Proved ineffective as Redmond sac-flies to right center. Terrible throw by Swisher. Must have been the reflection of his chin hair.

10:08pm - Punto clears the bases with a double to the left field corner. I told you you wouldn't like Punto angry.

10:10pm - Gomez up. Soft fly to left field. Carlos Quintin dives and misses. Swisher runs over and misses picking up the ball. Ahh, yes. These are the White Sox I remember. No one knows how this was scored at the game. It couldn't have been a triple but it didn't seem like a double either. Official announcement: Double. Gomez (3-4, HR, 3B, 2B)

Gomez right before his double.

10:11pm - Ozzie comes out to the mound, takes out Buehrle. Calls for Octavio. Buehrle comes back to the dugout, grabs a bat and smashes the shit out of the space heater in the dugout. So funny.

10:12pm - Harris and Monroe shoot the shit with the guy sitting next to us with Dotel warms up. He says his little brother is Monroe's biggest fan and is in Special Ed. I don't believe him, but he gets a ball anyway.

10:20pm - Hecklers behind me tell Monroe, if he grounds out to Crede he has to buy us all beers. They included me, which I thought was nice. Monroe looks over and nods in agreement to the bet. Unfortunately for us, he strikes out swinging. He looks back and asked the Ump if it would have been ball four had he not swung. The ump says yes, and Monroe grabs his bat at yells "Fuck."

10:30pm - Remember that blow up doll I told you about. Well it came back out and they sat her in a seat with a ticket in her hand in case they came and checked. They did, and they didn't believe her. When they started making a hole to deflate her, everyone started yelling things like"she already has 3 perfectly good ones!" Then the security guard gave it to the Bat Boy to throw away. What kind of grown man gives a young boy a blowup doll?

Here she is. So hot.

10:31pm - AJ hits a double off of a diving Gomez that can't come up with it. I guess he can't do everything.

10:40pm - Boone Logan comes in to relieve Dotel. Works a 1-2-3 inning.

10:46pm - Ehren Wassermann comes in to pitch. Worst name ever.

10:47pm - Gomez leads off the ninth. Not sure if he heard me but I told him no matter where he hits it, stay on first base. Must have been good luck because he legs out an in-field single to complete the cycle. Gomez, 4-5 (HR, 3B, 2B, Single). Gomez pumps his fist several times in excitement.

10:48pm - Masset comes in for Wassermann.

10:50-11:10pm - Flood gates open. Gomez is up again. Almost gets hit by Masset. But ends up striking out. (Question for AH! experts: How many players have hit for the cycle and struck out twice?) Twins up 13-0 going into the bottom of the ninth.

11:11pm - Dye hits it hard over the left field fence. There goes the shutout.

11:14pm - AJ goes 3-4 with a 1 out single in the bottom of the ninth. Guys behind me still want to know if I want him on the team. I still say 'no'.

11:15pm - Bases loaded 1 out. Looks like Guerrier is warming up in the bullpen. I think this is the first action in the BP all night. Not sure though.

11:19pm - Alexei Ramirez grounds out to third. Game over.

11:22pm - They locked the bathrooms. WTF.

Gomez - (4 for 6) HR, 3B, 2B, single and two SO.
Congratulations Go-Go. I am glad I could be there and see it.


tfrezac2002 said...

Johan who?

Daymonster said...

Johan Santana, he used to be a pitcher for the twins, he was really good, but we traded hi..... OOOOOH I get it.

soup said...

great stuff daymonster.

haasertime said...


linda said...

Sounds like a memorable game. The good, the bad and the ugly!

Karleeee said...

"He looks back and asked the Ump if it would have been ball four had he not swung. The ump says yes, and Monroe grabs his bat at yells "Fuck." "


And oh, I like mad Punto ;)

Jim H. said...

Comiskey Park report card
(based on daymonster's account of this game)

Corporate ballpark name: F
Grounds crew competency: D
Heckling: B+
Base ball playing (CWS): C-
Ceremonial first pitch: A
Young's self-criticism: A+

Jim H. said...

oops. that should be Monroe's self-criticism (as pointed out by Karleeee)

Daymonster said...

haha, I was so confused I re-read my post to see where I talked about Delmon.

The only thing I remember about Delmon was all his stuff was Under Armor which just gave the hecklers plenty of material.

HaAsErTiMe said...

that was the best account of a game i've ever read. That game must have been tons of fun. but I'd be scared to sit next to that Peterson fella.

bizmarkie507 said...

Great read. That must've been one of the best Twins games you've ever been to.

Does anybody besides me hate the nickname Go-Go-Gomez?

TwinsWin83 said...

thats a pretty good account of a game for having had a few 6.99 miller lites.

'slump buster' is hillarious.

Daymonster said...

I am not totally against the name, I don't mind Gogomez and Go-Go by themselves, but Go-Go-Gomez is a little too much for me.

Karleeee said...

how about go-go-gadget-gomez-speed-racer-zroom!


yeah.too much.
He's G-money.

Daymonster said...

C-Go? CarGo? Carlomez? The Mez?

haasertime said...


bizmarkie507 said...

You know what else I hate? the way Blyleven says Paul Konerko. But I do love it when he's half in the bag by the 6th inning.

Go-go-gadgetspeedralostsofletters is great because it reminds me of Gadget from Rescue Rangers. Cargo is pretty awesome too.