Wednesday, December 5, 2007

All Things Considered, This Is Not Fun

By M. Haas

It seems that everything in back to square one in the Santana sweepstakes. We've been waiting and waiting. And then waiting some more. It's an interesting time for Twins fans. Most can't even agree on whether or not the Twins are playing to win in 2008. I wish it would just be over with so we could talk about the Twins chances. There's not much to say. All I know, is that I have been too wrapped up in this stuff.

Here's what I have learned from this off season so far:

- Hank Steinbrenner somehow sucks even more than his dad. But no one is sure how badly he sucks; and it all depends on the point of view. Non deals are just as important as deals. And by the way, how did the changing of the guard in the Yankees organization fly so far under the radar?

- The word "nearly" does not mean what you think it means.

- One can never pay too close attention to rumors. If they were true, they wouldn't be called rumors. Seriously. When they come true, it's cool - but that hardly ever happens. There has been about one thousand rumors about Santana, but next to no one saw the Marlins - Tigers trade...

- The Tigers will be good next season. They were second in the A.L. in runs scored last season, and look to be even better in '08. So how does this impact the Twins? I don't know, but it will be hard to win the division.

- How far away is April 2010? Someone do the math. It's farther than it seems. Delmon Young will be playing in the Metrodome next year. And the next. That's two seasons. That's depressing.

If anyone is near Nashville and wants to start some rumors. Print out the Official Alright Hamilton! Johan Santana Trade Rumor Mask. And walk into the Gaylord Opryland Hotel & Convention Center and start giving interviews.


If you want to start a rumor that he went to Boston, download this mask.

If you want to say Johan is playing for the Yankees download this mask.

Or if you want to say Santana is staying with the Twins, retiring from baseball or going to any of the other 26 teams that can't afford him, download this mask.

5 comments:

TwinsWin83 said...

I feel like Im taking crazy pills. The Twins need to go back to Hank in NY and tell him "hey, remember that Johan for Melky and Hughes offer? We were just kinding before, we're down for that."

Anonymous said...

Wowee...I know that picture of Johan is supposed to be a mask, but it looks really creepy without eyeballs. Am I weird to be skeeved out by that? Is skeeved even a word?

soup said...

If there was a blog awards show...AH! would definitely win the best visual affects award.

Karin said...

im about to hitchhike to Nashville just so I can wear one of those masks.

Anonymous said...

If johan would go to Seattle that sounds like the best offer so far. We'd have Adam Jones (not pacman) patrolling CF for the next 10 years and Brandon Morrow is a great young pitcher. Sign me up.