Orlando Hudson's Batting Helmet

Newly acquired second-baseman Orlando Hudson has plenty of redeeming qualities. He plays great defense, gets on base at a better rate than Matt Tolbert, and wears a double ear-flap batting helmet.

That got me thinking about other Twins who have worn the double-ear flap. It's not the kind of thing you can just look up in the media guide.

I sent an e-mail to Paul Lukas, probably the foremost uniform expert in the country. Here's his reply:

Can't think of any other Twins double-flappers, although there have probably been a few over the years... Hudson has been double-flapping his entire career, so he'll definitely be doing in Minnesota too. Enjoy!

Even though Mr. Lukas was stumped, the Alright Hamilton research team had already come up with Chuck Knoblauch. Old Knobby, old sport. Look at him. And he wasn't even a switch hitter.

I wish Alright Hamilton employed a sports psychologist; we could really have some fun picking apart Knoblauch. Does he have a mental compulsion thing like Jason Segel? He can't wear anything on his head that isn't symmetrical. That's okay. Maybe our psychologist could help us answer other questions, such as: was Chuck Knobluach the most un-twin of all time? He's like a film-noir anti-hero. He helped the Twins win the World Series, but at what cost? He must have had some ulterior motive, like some elaborate scheme to put him in a better position to choke more people. Then again, he didn't seem like the kind of guy who could scheme elaborately.

We don't like our ballplayers to be too different up here in Minnesota. Knoblauch was really different. He was a second baseman who could hit. He was seemingly uncoachable, yet still played really well. That wasn't how life was supposed to work.

Maybe he acted like a spoiled brat because he was spoiled by winning a championship and rookie of the year. After that, he probably imagined that every year he'd bring home some hardware while playing in an intense seven-game World Series. No wonder he was bitter by 1995.

Or maybe the fans are too hard on him, our perceptions skewed by the march of time and our inferiority complex. Whoa Doc, don't turn this back on me.

Of course, any discussion about Twins batting helmets has to include Earl Battey. He invented the flap. Before Battey, everyone just wore John Olderud helmets.



UPDATE:

Commenter HandsOnNight has come up with two Twins who've also worn the double ear flap:

Fans Shift Focus From Whining To Constructing Batting Order

How does the Orlando Hudson affect the batting order? That's the question many Twins fans are attempting to answer today by feverishly jotting down lineups. Yes, it's out with the old and in with the new for the Twins faithful, who've spent much of the winter complaining about their teams inactivity.

Most Minnesotans have had these thoughts running through their heads, twitters or blogs:

FIRE BILL SMITH. First he screws up the Santana trade, then he trades for the terrible DELMON YOUNG... And now he's content with this joke of a team that can barely win the WORST DIVISION IN BASEBALL.. . . . The whole organization is CONTENT with MEDIOCRITY. They just want to play for the future instead of GOING FOR A CHAMPIONSHIP. ...ALFONSO SORIANO ..HIGH TICKET PRICES . . . . THE YANKEES.... . .. .WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY...ADRIAN BELTRE.. NEW STADIUM. . . .. . . JOE MAUER.... REVENUE FROM TAX FUNDED STADIUM. . . SWEPT IN PLAYOFFS again. . . . . C'MON!

Now that the Twins have finally pieced together a decent off-season, will their followers finally give them credit? Probably not. And even if they gave Billy Smith his due, they'd forget to thank Joe Mauer; for it was he who included a "sign a decent two-hitter" clause into his new contract. Great job.

No, instead of offering apologies, fans will turn their attention to projecting the batting order. Quick! Look up Orlando Hudson's on-base percentage! Compare it to JJ Hardy's! Does Michael Cuddyer's productive September mean he should bat fourth and complete the lefty-righty-lefty-righty-lefty-righty order? Talk about balance! Brendan Harris would make for an above average 9 hitter, but will Gardenhire's man-crush on Nick Punto take precedent? The answers to a few questions only create more questions! Oh, to be a fan!

Span
Hudson
Mauer
Morneau
Kubel
Cuddyer
Young
Hardy
Harris


Of course, old habits die hard for some Twins fans. While filling out their imaginary line-up cards, some undoubtedly came across "3B" and then started howling for Joe Crede or Robb Quinlan. Some fans inexplicably expect the Twins to sign aging starting pitcher Jerrod Washburn, even though they probably haven't spoken to him since they signed Carl Pavano.

WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY.

Old Thome stream of consciousness

The Twins signed Jim Thome, you guys! Like a while ago. I haven't been procrastinating the Twins-signed-Thome-post. I've been using the time to process the information surrounding his signing. I don't like to rush to judgment when the Twins sign a player. My preferred method of assessing the value of a free agent signing is reading what other sports writers and bloggers write about it...with a mood ring on.

After reading numerous articles and posts, my mood ring continuously shown an enlightening "Indian Red." (Sorry, I apparently have the world's most racist mood ring. It's really old.) According to the mood ring handbook, "Indian Red" means "indifferent." Not exactly a mood if you ask me, but who am I to tell a mood ring handbook it's wrong. Anyway, I guess I'm indifferent about the Thome signing.

He'll be a solid DH against righties and a very nice pinch hitting option. But I couldn't help remember a Jim Thome third-baseman not so many years ago. Of course, it only feels like a few years ago he was doing his thing at the hot corner, but really it has been almost 14 years. I was still methodically blowing into occasionally-working video games the last time Thome was playing 3B. That makes me feel old. And if this makes me feel old, I can't imagine how old the actually old, Jim Thome, must feel.

Jim Thome is a good guy. So when he gets older and worse at defense, it seems most baseball people are permissive. Thome became a 1B because he got older. Then he became a DH because he got older. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with this, but compare this to my boy Miguel Cabrera.

They both transitioned from third to first at about the same age. The perception of these position changes, however, is very different. Cabrera is lazy and ate himself out of any defensive value. Thome, however...well he just got older.

And I understand how much harder it is to keep in shape as you get older. Age is a bitch. Even a few years ago I might wake up in the morning and say, "Hey, it's a nice day. Maybe I'll go for a run." Now I wake up and say, "Hey, it's a nice day. Maybe I'll watch TV with the windows open." I, however, am not a professional athlete.

I have no idea where I'm going with this. Please tell me we've signed Mauer and/or Hudson already.

Essay Contest: Orlando Hudson or Joe Mauer?

Yesterday, Twins territory was teased by rumors of imminent and important deals. The club was reported to be engaged in "serious discussions" with free-agent second baseguy Orlando Hudson. Plus, Mark Rosen came on the radio to report the Twins and Joe Mauer had agreed "in principal" on a new ten-year contract. It was an exciting day for those of us who follow the Twins disgustingly close.

If both those deals actually occur, it would represent a wild shift in (how most perceive) the teams' philosophy: cheap, cheap and cheap. The payroll would push towards $95 million, which is pretty wild considering they're opening day 2008 payroll was just $56 million.

And that's why all this seems too good to be true. It just doesn't seem possible that the Twins would shell out $3 million to Hudson and $220 million to Mauer; not for Twins fans who have spent half their lives complaining about their clubs frugal ways.

So here's the (strictly hypothetical) quandary: If you can only sign one player, which would you choose?


A few things to chew on:

- Hudson would take valuable at-bats from developing prospect Nick Punto.

- They'd have to sign Mauer to a long, long contract - seven to ten years. By that time he could be 40 to 45 years old.

- Mauer has lots of family in the area, but Hudson has NONE.

- Hudson could hit second in the lineup, instead of Jerry White.

- Mauer is a troublemaker

- Twins would have to get Hudson a new jersey and everything. Mauer already has one.

- A huge Mauer contract would eat up nearly a quarter of the teams payroll. Would the Twins have enough money left for that new dress they've had their eye on?

- Hudson is a shrimp boat captain.


Essays are due by tonight (Tuesday) at 11:55pm CST. Post them in the comments section or e-mail them to me (haasertime (at) yahoo)

Please, no funny solutions like "I think they should first sign Hudson and then use some of the Shrimp Boat money to help keep Mauer Chevrolet afloat to build goodwill with the Mauer Family so he'll sign back with us next winter after we trade him to Seattle for Ichiro in July"

Because I already thought of that.

Don't Even Bother Reading This Blog Notes Post

- TwinsFest weekend! Back to the Dome we go. Another crack at the dome dog. Oh Boy! Check out our AH TwinsFest Guide we threw together last year. To summarize: it's barely worth attending unless you're a crazy autograph person.

- Our favorite club released their single game ticket prices for the new ballpark. Target Field has the second most pricing sections in all of baseball, featuring three tiers of games (value, select and premium,) a $10 spike in all front-row seats, and more color coding than a care bears movie.

Here's a better map, to help reduce repetitive stress syndrome.

- Did you see this headline? Jose Valverde finalizes two-year contract with... Jose Valverde.


He must take the idea of New Years Resolutions very, very seriously.


- How about this t-shirt? Anyone have experience with screen printing? We should absolutely print up a dozen of these and sell them illegally; not to make a buck, but to spread the love and be awesome pirates.




- I saw this headline on ESPN the other day:

Dawson may wear Cubs hat for speech

Seems like a risky move. Dawson could end up offending a lot of Expos fans in the process.

Caption contest

Mauer Contract Coming Soon?

There have been very unofficial and unconfirmed rumors swirling that Twins catcher Joe Mauer and the team will come to terms on a new contract soon. Although team officials and Mauer himself remain tight-lipped, a couple people seem convinced the announcement could come within 36 hours.

Star Tribune sports columnist tweeted this morning:

Hum is getting louder that Twins will announce Mauer contract extension as kickoff to Twins Fest.

And former Twins beat writer Howard Sinker reluctantly blogged this:

This one is dicey and I'm hesitant to share. But I'd feel like I was holding out if I didn't ... and I am totally confident you all understand the difference between reporting and passing along web chatter. One of my Facebook friends posted this as his status after going to the ESPN taping with Joe Mauer at Cretin-Derham Hall las night: "Talked to Reilly after the interview and he said Shapiro (Mauer's agent) told him that everyone will be surprised at how quickly things may get done."

It would certainly be perfect timing for the organization, with the state turning it's attention from the Vikings to the Twins, and the annual TwinsFest kicking off Friday evening. With excitement ratcheting up toward the opening of Target Field, the Twins stand to sell a lot of tickets, and a Mauer contract would certainly help. A marketing move this shrill hasn't been seen since the guy who decided to put bumper stickers on the rear bumper.

Baseball and Cigarettes: A Winning Combination

Hello, my name is Mike and today, I'm thinking about picking up a delicious habit of smoking cigarettes. As a baseball fan, which cigarette brand most appeals to me?

Chesterfield



Look! It's 1946 MVP winners Stan Musial and Ted Williams! And you better believe they know their ABC's. Always Buy Chesterfield. Why? because they're always milder, better tasting and cooler smoking. These two elite ballplayers like them so much, they bought ten packs just for today!

Here's what The Man says about Chesterfield Cigarettes:

When you smoke Chesterfield it's so satisfying to know the one cigarette that's
low in nicotine and highest in quality. And it's so satisfying to know that a
doctor no adverse effect to the nose, throat and sinuses from smoking
Chesterfield.

Yikes. Stan Musial is easily satisfied.

Camel

Look! It's baseball great Lou Gehrig! It appears the he prefers Camel cigarettes for three reasons.

1. They don't get your wind. (What would they do with it anyway?)
2. It's the best part of eating. (The best part? Of eating? He must be doing it wrong)
3. They're mild, therefore, they're great for steady smoking. (Lou Gehrig holds the record for consecutive cigarettes smoked, at 2,130. Teammate Wally Pipp offered him his first.)

Funny, I would have pegged the luckiest man on earth to smoke...

Lucky Strike


If I were a big Brooklyn fan, I'd probably smoke Luckies. The stellar Dodger battery of Don Newcombe and Roy Campanella both "go for Luckies." Newcombe exclaims that he "look(s) forward to coming back to the clubhouse for a Lucky. There's a cigarette that tastes like a million bucks." And apparently that was a lot of money for a ballplayer back then.

Camel, part 2


Camel Cigarettes helped calm the nerves of two different World Series winning teams in back-to-back seasons. They're like the Tom Emanski of cigarettes. Forget Orlando Hudson, Billy Smith has gotta go after R.J. Reynolds!