Monday, January 31, 2011

CraigsList is Pure Entertainment

I've bought and sold a few things on CraigsList, but the amount of transactions is pretty tiny compared to the amount of time I spend browsing the site. Holy cow wow I love browsing the site. It's a slice, nay, a snapshot of humanity, in all it's disgusting hypersexuality and materialism.

The job section can be very interesting, although it's overwhelming because there are so many different types of jobs in so many places. There are 31 different categories of jobs on CraigsList, not including a section just for part-time work. And I love that they included an et-cetera section, just in case a job listing doesn't fit into any of the others. I can imagine someone (in a cowboy hat) asking, "so, what line a work you in?" and I'd reply, "et-cetera."

Basically, every single job listing is written in such a way that makes their position sound absolutely wonderful. Like this one, under the vague heading Project Manager:

A fast growing wholesale business is looking for the right individual to  make a huge impact and to help lead the company in growth. Specific  responsibilities are: strategic sourcing and vendor relations, accurate  fulfilling of custom orders and managing all operations. Other job  duties could include margin analysis and pricing and special projects.

Grow with the company. Sounds so loving and co-operative. Also, these ads never tell you how hard the job will be. Sure, they list job responsibilities, but they always sound so simple and easy. Strategic sourcing? Great, combines two of my favorite activities. Vendor relations? Sure, whenever I see the guy refilling the coke machine, I say hello and ask him for a free coke. Managing all operations? How hard can that be?
Must have a strong project management background with excellent organization skills. Must love details, analysis, decision making and  getting things done. Must have strong software skills and be a quick  learner in all Microsoft products.

If they're looking for someone who LOVES details, analysis, decision making and getting things done, they might as well just build a robot. Seriously, some poor sap who needs this job is going to walk in there babbling on and on about how he's loved details and analysis since he was a little kid. Can you even imagine the kind of environment that values those lame characteristics so ridiculously high? The employees probably cut loose after work by rigidly cleaning their cubicles.

5 comments:

bizmarkie507 said...

r.i.p.

Daymonster said...

That's not just craigslist, that's all of job postings.

I remember working at CareerBuilder, I would sometimes help clients write their openings. Often I would either have to fix their post to make it say SOMETHING about what the job actually is, otherwise they get thousands of people that have no reason applying for the job.

The other thing that would happen is the job posting would be so specific that no one would ever want it. Almost all jobs suck, and these postings would explain why they sucked. No one ever applied to them. Also, when companies use interoffice names and acronyms, people have no idea what the hell they are talking about. "Must have the ability to reproduce specs to the CAUTSFSFG's in the bridge, hub and east wing" WTF is a CAUTSFSFG? Where is the hub and east wing?

There needs to be a balance.

Brady said...

Missed Connections is fucking ridiculous.

haasertime said...

That comment made me LoL. Maybe I'll expand on that someday.

bizmarkie507 said...

i just bought a sigma acoustic guitar with case for 250 off of craigslist. excellent condition, pretty good bargain. glad im not a girl so i dont have to worry about being murdered.