Weekend links

-A facetious post about Joe Mauer not being the AL MVP because he chose baseball instead of going to Florida State. Of course, internet commenters don't get it, freak out.

-This tree picked the wrong guy to impale.

Still, he knew the situation was desperate. That's when Jack remembered the
military mantra he relied on during his 38 years in the army."You define the
problem...you identify alternatives... you accumulate relevant information...
and then you make a decision. My problem was I got this tree in me," explained
the tree accident victim.

Which is better than I would have done. Define the problem...THEN FLIP THE F%#K OUT BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN IMPALED BY A F #*KING TREE...die.

-You know all the problems that Large Hadron Collider is having? Well the latest one is because of a time traveling bird.

-My good friend started blogging at Schlepping Minnesota Sports. He's already mocked the first two rounds of the 2010 fantasy baseball draft...which is why he'll probably beat me again next year.

-What your taste in beer says about you

-Minnesota native, lawyer, and professional mixed martial artists Nick "The Goat" Thompson has tried out and made it past the first day of auditions for Spike TV's "The Ultimate Fighter." This would be a big step forward for neck beards around the world.

-Alright Hamilton! would like to congratulate Titan as the world tallest dog. Lost in Titan's tallness, however, is all the other awesome records broke Thursday.

"Only one animal got credit for a record Thursday, the same day Norway registered the world's largest gingerbread man; the most people hugging in one minute were in the U.K.; Italy set the mark for the fastest consumption of a bowl of pasta; Finland had the most nationalities in a single sauna; and a team from Mexico assembled the world's longest paper clip chain. "

Now that, ladies and gentlemen, is a sentence. MOST NATIONALITIES IN A SINGLE SAUNA!!!!!!!

-1930's plan to take over Canada

- Theory on international politics and zombies

- Finally, this animated short of Doc Ellis' 1970 no-hitter is the awesome.