Key Off-Season Acquisition: Groundskeeper.

- The Twins announced yesterday they've hired a heads-groundskeeper for Target Field. Larry DeVito has spent the last 12 seasons with three organizations, bouncing between the majors and Triple-A. Upon viewing Target Field, he expressed disappointment over the large number of port-a-potties near the home plate area, but was assured that they'd be removed. He also expressed optimism that he could fill the hole at third base. (Brian's joke, not mine)

Jarrod Washburn: Again?

There have been some goofy reports swirling lately. I still don't understand the one about Gagne being offered a contract, essentially accepting it, and then the Twins pulling it so they could explore trade options. And I really don't understand the Delmon Young to the Mariners for Jarrod Washburn and a catching prospect. Then the rumor was shot down almost as soon as it was brought up.

Howard had a good point about the nature of trade rumors in the age of the internet. Rumors and leads tend to snowball, and potential trades are analyzed before they're even a whisper in a GM's ear.

All this Washburn, Crede and Gagne talk means one or two things:

1. Billy Smith is still trying. Or at least trying to look like he's trying. He's already claimed that he's satisfied with the roster as it is, so who knows.

2. Twins fans, beat writers and bloggers are bored. There hasn't been a lot to discuss this off-season, so every small tidbit, "Crede workout!!" is turned into a Very Big Deal. There are a lot of Twins fans clamoring for any upgrade at all, even if it wouldn't an upgrade. Does that make sense? We all need something to talk about.

Want to anger on-screen talent?

Try walking in their line of sight while they're on camera. Christian Bale freaked out while on set of the new Terminator movie. Which reminded me of Chris Berman. There's also a funny compilation of of Bale's tirade and Bill O'Reilleys.